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Things may be coming together.
We'll see my sanity level next week. But for now...

My birthday is Sunday.
Not very important.

Guess I'm going to get lunch or something, but my intake for the day has been water, and Arizona Green Tea.
xP

Yay for food choices...
I started finding some good Freelance Writing gigs.
Kinda excited.

Seriously, if I could make a consistent living off freelance work I'd be so happy. Guess I got to work on my sewing/painting/photography/knitting/music playing for those commission type side job things.

:/

So in the incredibly soon to come movement (though it's soon to come in my head) I see myself being a less extreme modern day Gertrude Stein.
Good? Bad? Should it matter? She defined a movement and a moment and a style. That will be me.

I'll be reinventing societal wheels. Not just literary structures and future artists...

"I am useless without a studio audience."

So I've become more partial to female vocalists as of late, and I've started to really enjoy my time alone.

Maybe this is healthy. Maybe this is good.

Watching V For Vendetta and finishing The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas.

So I'm starting to apply and check out different freelance writing jobs that I would love to do and make a little bit of cash. The only ones to respond so far were different porn companies that wanted me to review their movies for magazines and what not. xD

Ugh. Is that how I am going to start my writing career??
So I've been at my mom's since Saturday afternoon, and it's been really nice. A chance to relax and less temptation to stay out super fuckin' late.
I guess I'm going to finish Amadeus and head home. My headache is going away.

School, ugh... School. I think I just need to sleep. I'm really tired and getting sick again. Hopefully just from lack of sleep. :/

I don't remember why I was going to update.

Silversun Pickups was awesome of course. :)

"You struck a chord..."

So I sat on Bob's balcony with Gertrude Stein's Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas and read and observed the race. Being that whole Gran Prix weekend, Bob's condo looks right over the road/track/street thing. There were some drifters earlier.

John thinks I sent a bee to sting him. Well other than him calling me the Bee Woman and attacking him with my minions of "les-bees" apparently he actually got stung today.
John... I'm not the bee lady, woman, whatever. Bees scare the shit out of me and make me want to cry sometimes, seeing as how I'm incredibly allergic. But thank you for giving me some sort of power xD We all know I need more crazy powers to control things in nature. xDDDD

Apparently we (Rudy, Matt, June, Madison and I) are trying to figure out when and how we are getting down to 2nd st. to see the free Silversun Pickups show at Fingerprints. I might actually just stay here tonight after the show and then go see Ronni tomorrow morning and just become for the party. I thought there may be a chance in me going out tonight, but with the drive and situation, I don't think I am. Oh well, better luck next time. Maybe someday soon gas wont be $4 a gallon and I wont mind driving to San Diego.

It's kind of creepy because Bob has a huge fuckin' plasma screen monitor thing and I'm watching myself type on this huge fuckin' TV.
Holy shit this screen in bigger than the one Devin has in his room and I haven't seen a monitor that big ever. xD

I'm really bored and I get I should call Rudy and figure this out so Madison isn't left in the dark. Let alone me being confused. I'm usually the most confused, so I don't know why I should be more so than the rest of the group.

There's nothing on TV and my mom has really crappy music on her iTunes so I have to go through different bands on my myspace. xP

This is bullshit.

Well I found a good song and I guess I should end on this, seeing as it's the only good song I've heard in the past hour (aside from the Flowbots xDDDDDDD).
So here it is.

"I'll find you staring at the sky."

So I'm about to leave to meet up with Matt and Rudy :P It's a Friday and I'm awake so early.
We're going to go hit up some thrift stores and make our way down to Figerprints so we can get passes to their free show tomorrow night. I guess like, if you're on the mailing list then you just head over and give them your info and get a pass? I hope it's that simple.

I'm going to do yoga today. Swim, maybe. But yoga for sure.

Need to straighten my hair and set my batteries to charge for tomorrow.

And get a coffee. This is way to early to be awake on a Friday.

Sweet melodic memories float ’round my head like the smoke bubbles that descend toward the ground;
Ascend-
-Descend-
-Rise-
-Fall-
Sweet simple notes fall softly onto waiting ears as a subtle bombardment of rythmic movement follows.
Not staying in the background, nor upstaging.
Just beautiful sweetly swayed notes

Sorrowful whispers ring.
Low,
Solemn,
Prominent.
Rising only to establish its presence.

You fill my mind and my lungs.
And though necessary for clarity I hesitantly
- e x h a l e -
Losing your presence and your beauty in one short
Simple
Breath.

I try to inhale your beauty again and again.
But the void you left is too great to fill.
Your indigo winds push me to follow your path.

And I become you.
Invoke you.

S i m p l y ,
S w e e t l y ,
S o m b e r .

- 04.01.08 Mushroom Tea "Exhale"

When did Penn & Teller become my stress reliever and comforting aspect for my day?

Dude, when did you have to start dealing with corporations when it comes to burying the dead. Shit man. >8X

:/


My Personality
Neuroticism
89
Extraversion
13
Openness to Experience
83
Agreeableness
55
Conscientiousness
12
You are not generally self conscious about yourself, however you tend to lack energy and have difficult initiating activities. You tend to feel overwhelmed by, and therefore actively avoid, large crowds. You often need privacy and time for yourself. You tend not to express your emotions openly and are sometimes not even aware of your own feelings. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up, however you do not enjoy confrontation, but you will stand up for yourself or push your point if you feel it is important. You are content to get by with a minimal amount of work, and might be seen by others as lazy.

Take a Personality Test now or view the full Personality Report.

The best Buying Pet Gifts.

"Experience the warmth-"

So why the fuck did I bring it up???
I am a dumb fucking cunt sometimes, but you know what, I took the one small step so I could see what would happen. I feel pretty stupid, but maybe I was high, or maybe I was just curious.

You have to know I like you. You have to. So fuck it.
I guess I was right. I am so Michael, and you are my Jan.

I guess I'm going to hide out at Paisley's and try to read for my class. Maybe I'll take some markers and whatnot.
I started writing/drawing out something that was inspired by how light headed I get when I smell weed and cologne. I don't even need to smoke.

Paisley made a fuck ton of astrological icons, so I snagged some Taurus and a Leo, just for the current situation. I guess tonight I'll use the Leo seeing as that who is currently on my mind.

I'm fucking rambling. 8X

I hope I did well on my essay today for Poli Sci. It's worth 10% of my grade and it was about "How sound is the evidence in this particular scene of the movie Philidelphia" which happens to make me cry. I've lost three people to sickness that has ocurred after contracting AIDS and due to no immunity and all that fucked up business... Watching that movie makes me bawl my fucing eyes out. Even in the middle of class. That and Tom Hanks and Antonio Banderas are so cute together and Denzel Washington was a lawsuit for Halloween.

The Office is tomorrow.
I can't wait!!!
I watched the last episode (where Jan sued the company and Jim played ping pong) at Devin's - so I could be a little up to date.

Friday is Tim's birthday, and I don't know what to get him/do for him and my mom wants me to stay at the condo, but I want to be with Tim. So I have no idea what decision I've, well, decided.

Okay, I'm just really rambling.

"And the red queen's on her head."

So basically:

+ My first class of the day [Communications] was cancelled. This class is at 9:30am and I really didn't want to wake up for it. xP So I go, get my coffee, pick up Stephanie, go back to her house to get something she forgot, get to school, park, walk and find out my class is fucking cancelled.
+ I don't have Sociology because my professor is at some conference.
+ I dropped Economics a while ago.
+ English doesn't start until 2:00pm.

So I'm posted up at my aunt and uncle's house 'til 1pm where I will probably head to school to fight for parking. Fun.

And Beachboard isn't working so I can't check if my professor left an anouncement that he wasn't going to be here.

So fuck.

I guess I'm going to lounge and catch up on my reading. Maybe start my paper [like a good student would].
I want breakfast.

What's good for breakfast?

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Silversun Pickups - "Future Foe Scenarios"

The things we laid do not amount to much
made of abandoned wood loose stones and such

this revolution baby
proves who you work for lately

release the castaways who run amok
from self appointed winds which blow and such
when present tense gets strangled in the mire
made of our cozy decomposing wires

who do you work for baby
and does it work for you lately

but when the night is over and the walls start burning
when fire starts to matter and the clock is churning
cliches and other chatter keeps our minds from
learning

it's alright

the things we laid do not amount to much
made up of thought balloons and cotton swabs
when present tense gets strangled in the woes
made of our future foe scenarios

this revolution baby
proves who you work for lately
who do you work for baby
and does it work for you lately

but when the night is over and the walls keep linking
when fire starts to matter and the clock keeps sinking
cliches and other chatter keeps our minds from
thinking
our minds keep thinking

it's alright

that's when it turned on me
a motorcade of 'meant to be's’
parades of beauty queens
where soft entwines make kindling
these many detailed things
like broken nails and plastic rings
will win by keeping me
from speaking to my new darling
and there's no way to know
our future foe scenarios
that's when it turned on me
where bobby pins hold angel wings

it's alright
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